Ohhhhh, you're supposed to maintain a BLOG. I gotcha. *V-8 smack*
What a week we've had! OY.
In the nonexistent post-rape handbook, in the section on how I'm supposed to BE, feel, act, etc. I'm pretty much whacked in the head! One minute I'm joyful to be free of the control of an asshole...the next I'm crying because I don't want to lose the house, yet lost my source of income (daycare...cant do daycare in a "domestic violence" house, I guess). No income, at all. Desperately trying to find a good job. Sooooo, I'm swallowing my stupid pride and seeking any and all State Aid I can qualify for.
My kids and I are all set with Counseling. We need it. The littles are sure acting up.
Here is a list of DH's official charges (sit down for this, it's a doozy):
1. Aggravated Sexual Assault- first degree felony
2. Attempted Murder - second degree felony
3. Commission of Domestic Violence in the Presence of a Minor- third degree felony
5. see #3 (three kids)
I will be on board this entire journey. I will be at every hearing, trial, etc. I will NOT sit idle and let him get off easy. I will be the festering boil that never goes away.
I LOVE the District Attorney team that will be helping me. I told them right up front, I do NOT want to be a file in your stack. I don't want to be a case number. I want to be heard, understood, vindicated. I want my hell to help someone else.
So far, I've literally been blanketed in love by all my friends, neighbors, family, community. NO ONE has judged me. Not one!
I got a anonymous money order for $400 to help with my mortgage payment (THANK YOU FOR ANGELS!!!!!) and a few nights worth of dinners from neighbors, a few sweet gift certificates for a mani/pedi (the last for a looooong time), and lots of Easter stuff for my children...Oh, yeah, Easter is tomorrow! EEEK!
There's about a million appointments and lists of "To Do". My head is spinning, my kids are clingy, my credit is snowballing the wrong way, I'm broken, penniless, and TIRED....but I have the love and support of all the people I love and will get through this.
When life gives you lemons, (familiar? LOL) make lemonade. Make the sweetest lemonade the world has ever seen. Add some cherries and paper Barbie umbrellas in there for fun!